Commentary: Mortal Kombat Conquest Episode 9 - QUAN CHI

It's the Quan Chi episode so you know it's good

Neal 0:05
Should we clap?

Corey 0:06
Um, no.

Neal 0:10
Okay. Honestly, we don't need to like

Corey 0:14
no, I think we should we do need to.

Neal 0:17
We asked to we actually don't

Corey 0:21
we do though,

Neal 0:22
like, for the ritual?

Corey 0:25
Sure. Sorry, I got distracted by the fact that the quote today at the bottom of time.is is music can change the world because it can change people that's Bono.

Neal 0:38
Yeah man that are our greatest world treasure on on World Music Today on Earth.

Corey 0:45
Today I was talking about Bono

Neal 0:47
really

Corey 0:48
like literally an hour ago. An hour and a half. And um and I was trying to remember the name of edge the other guy that people know the name of sure and level with you and this is not a bit

Neal 1:05
I believe it's the edge but go on

Corey 1:07
note. I'm glad you said that. Because what I said was it was that other guy the sword Yes, it's Bono and the sword

Corey 1:23
and it's still funny.

Neal 1:26
Bono And the sword is it Is like a good like a band that plays like, but only like Battle of the Bands and they're the oldest band entered and they just hit up every single one.

Corey 1:38
If you want to avoid copyright, you could also just be Nobo and the sword.

Neal 1:42
It's the sequel to Ricky and the flash. If you've heard of that movie

Corey 1:48
Flash Gordon and the Flash

Neal 1:51
Josie and the Pussycats

Corey 1:54
Yeah.

Neal 1:55
Um, the Brian Setzer Orchestra. Should have been called 'Brian Setzer and the Orchestra' right?

Corey 1:57
The Trans Brian Setzer orchestra just like the Transsiberian one.

Neal 2:06
Uh huh. Bachman Turner Overdrive, et cetera.

Corey 2:09
I think that's ours. Right? We did that.

Neal 2:12
I'm pretty sure it was you

Corey 2:13
Canada?

Neal 2:14
Yeah, it was your it was your guys's fault. I'm pretty sure that was us. It was Bachman Turner, overdrive and rush I think.

Corey 2:22
Yeah. Rush is us for sure. Yeah. Yeah. What do you got a problem with Rush?

Neal 2:25
No, I'm happy about it.

Corey 2:27
What do you got a problem with the hit song y y Zed from the hit video game? 2002. Nope. Guitar Hero two. I don't know why it's the 2002. That's just not at all what I was trying to say.

Neal 2:37
As a as a Canadian band I, I guess it would have to be y y Zed not y y Z

Corey 2:43
That's just how you say that letter. But we don't have to talk about it.

Neal 2:46
That's weird. That's how you say that letter.

Corey 2:49
Why?

Neal 2:50
It's not weird. Actually, it would clear a lot of misc like miscommunications up if we just adopted Zed.

Corey 2:56
But is there a lot of miscommunication going on?

Neal 2:59
Like, Z sounds a lot like C, right?

Corey 3:02
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, sometimes Z sounds better. Like when It's very contextually here or there.

Neal 3:12
Zed doesn't sound like any other letter in the alphabet. None of the ones that I know about anyway.

Corey 3:20
Yeah like DoubleQ

Neal 3:20
(laughing) I'm trying to I want to minimize edits.

Corey 3:26
Yeah, good luck.

Neal 3:28
Fuck.

Corey 3:28
Good luck.

Neal 3:29
I gotta get this out, like tomorrow.

Corey 3:31
Yeah, it'll be fine.

Neal 3:32
Alright, 10 seconds.

Corey 3:36
98789 I clapped Did you?

Neal 3:43
I did. It was really not, it was a wimpy little clap. I can see it though. We're fine.

Corey 3:49
Hey, I'm gonna start the podcast now.

Neal 3:52
Cool. What's up,

Corey 3:53
Neal? Guess what time it is.

Neal 3:55
Kombat time!

Corey 3:57
It doesn't matter what time it is because of the longest day of the year. You've got all the time in the world. Oh, it's late, but the sun is still up. And with that time, we're going to do some Mortal Kombat conquest commentary on the MK pod quest. Summer Solstice. Spectacular. That's right gamers. We're going to be going till the sun goes down and the moon has come up and long ago somebody left with my cup. I had it full of water to hydrate during the podcast. It's not here anymore. All I have is the podcast until the sun goes down. And then legally we have to end it or we will be killed. Those are the summer solstice spectacular rules. I'm sorry, Neil. I know you're just learning this now that your life is on the line.

Neal 4:38
It's a lot. This is a lot to learn in a very exciting way.

Corey 4:43
But the sun has gone down the moon will come up. We may be killed and too long ago. Somebody left with my cup.

Neal 4:52
Doesn't matter, man. We're going the distance.

Corey 4:54
We're going for speed racer.

Neal 4:57
We are absolutely watching Speed Racer for the show. I'm gonna force you

Corey 5:01
Spoilers for future episodes of this show

Neal 5:04
you never agreed you never acknowledged it so I'm putting it on air. This is going out to our whole audience.

Corey 5:10
I acknowledged it What do you mean I didn't acknowledge it?

Neal 5:12
Maybe I just missed it. I resent that. All right,I'm not looking it up. I believe you. I'm sorry for doubting you. longest day of the year.

Corey 5:21
Yeah, more like the longest day of my life

Neal 5:24
if I ever go we're doing a commentary. Not just any commentary. Mortal Kombat conquest episode nine. Quan Chi Yeah, baby

Corey 5:39
can you hit every sound effect at once?

Neal 5:41
I can try *cacaphony of SFX*

Neal 5:56
(laughing) big day Longest Day best episode of Conquest

Corey 6:04
(laughing) the 'big theory boys' with the sexy music. I can't wait to hear that ithout Discord Clipping

Neal 6:16
I didn't think it was gonna work. I thought you hit one it the other one off. That was a pleasant surprise

Corey 6:22
We've entered a new frontier welcome to this podcast strange new worlds.

Neal 6:27
It's for now for the rest of the episode. If I feel the need to hit a sound cue. I'm just going to slap the whole pad with my hand and see what happens

Corey 6:36
"If I feel the need." Yeah, okay.

Neal 6:38
I've been slacking on them lately. Honestly. Like part of it is my setup. The buttons are further away because I needed more desk space. It doesn't we're not going to get into that here. I'll tell you about it another time. For now. I'm really tired. Let's watch some Mortal Kombat conquest.

Corey 6:56
I think we should do that. Yeah.

Neal 6:57
I'm so excited. I'm excited to watch this one again.

Corey 7:00
Yeah it's, I feel like people might not remember just what that was like. The first time

Neal 7:08
God it has, this episode has everything. Although Vorpax and Shang Tsung are not in it at all. So I guess it has almost everything.

Corey 7:16
Yeah, they did kind of fuck up not having like all the stuff you like in it?

Neal 7:20
Well you like Vorpax also.

Corey 7:22
Yeah but like, you know, I'm just sort of you said it so

Neal 7:25
Okay fair

Corey 7:26
I'm speaking as if I'm Neal

Neal 7:29
Gotcha this is very

Corey 7:29
You're Ne, famously you're Neal actually

Neal 7:34
This is confusing.

Corey 7:35
Well, it is the solstice.

Neal 7:37
Yeah, man. Everything's backwards.

Corey 7:39
This is the longest Neal of the year

Neal 7:41
We're in the upside down I think. Stranger Things is popular. Let's get to hear about this. SEO I've only seen the first season

Corey 7:49
search engine. Oh

Neal 7:53
fuck I- remember the countdown everybody. Three to one fight you hit you hit play on fight. All right. Are we all strapped in the audience ready to go Cory?

Corey 8:03
(tiny voice) Yeah.

Neal 8:07
Don't do it again. Round 9. We're jumping into it Round 9, 321 fight. Yeah, man.

Siro 8:26
You guys got to try this cake.

Neal 8:27
This is where we, I think first really hung out at Zhu Zin Applebee's, isn't it?

Corey 8:33
Zhu Zapplebee's.

Neal 8:34
Zhu Zinplebee's. I have a credit.

Neal 8:40
I'm hitting on the waiterrrr

Neal 8:44
I have a credit for the waitress. Magda played by Dorian John. Okay, Dorian John is an actress known for Mortal Kombat conquest. These are her only two credits. She was in two of these.

Corey 8:53
Okay

Neal 8:53
Dorian John is an actress known for Mortal Kombat conquest. These are her only two credits. She was in two of these.

Taja 9:00
You know, you were always pretty polite

Corey 9:05
Yeah. Siro famously extremely polite. Also, I know you're trying to limit edits when I'm hearing like an echo of your track.

Neal 9:11
It should be gone now.

Corey 9:13
Oh, is it?

Neal 9:14
Yeah

Corey 9:14
well, I was hearing it

Neal 9:15
No, I know. I didn't have the fader all the way down. That's my bad. We're leaving it in.

Corey 9:20
How many times, so Kung Lao was just like, they're just like, hey, they're gonna kill this random lady. And he's, he's not at the point yet in his life, where he has any skepticism towards that at all.

Neal 9:31
He's gonna get baited no less than twice in this episode. By a woman in peril. Like I honestly like props to him to continuously be like, but what if this time it's not a trap? I really need to save people.

Corey 9:44
Did he just take food while he was leaving?

Neal 9:47
Well he ordered that rum cake. It's like they don't have to go boxes. It's an Applebee's. Just like real Applevees

Corey 9:52
Everybody's favorite Mortal Kombat character, Cassie

Neal 9:56
played by Beth McKenzie. She has two film credits Cassie and Mortal Kombat conquest and Jamie Davis in where evil lies.

Corey 10:06
I can't believe she just sold the last of the roses before Taja could buy them.

Neal 10:10
Alright quiet Jamie Presley's on screen, All right?

Corey 10:16
Oh, what are we not talking through? That's gonna be a quiet episode

Neal 10:19
She's on screen a lot. Jamie Pressly is here and Dana Hee. As Mika and Siann

Corey 10:27
Jamie Pressly, arguably the most famous person we've encountered to date.

Neal 10:32
I don't know if Eva Mendez- to date for sure. I dont know if Eva Mendes surpasses-

Corey 10:36
I think Eva Mendes has cleared Jaime Pressly.

Corey 10:39
She had her moment for sure. But she was not star of a sitcom opposite Anna, Ana Faris for 90 years. But she was in 2 fast 2 furious.

Corey 10:51
Yeah, who among us wasn't in 2 Fast 2 furious?

Neal 10:56
fresh off her starring role in poison ivy the new seduction.

Corey 11:01
I like how Kung Lao was looking around like, Wait, hold on. Is this a fight? Are we fighting? Like he doesn't even look like he knows what's happening yet.

Neal 11:10
royally fucked up to that they just broke a woman's neck. Like,

Corey 11:16
that's a Mortal Kombat. Baby.

Neal 11:17
That's a fatality. We haven't been doing a good job keeping track of fatalities on these commentaries. Let me see. Well, we have not pulled that note up now.

Corey 11:28
"...befell three strangers" Smoke, Kung Lao. Can you imagine if I did that every time?

Neal 11:34
You should do it every time we'll get

Corey 11:36
I'm gonna do what I want to do it from the beginning.

Neal 11:38
We might get a cease and desist. All right.

Corey 11:42
I don't think anybody's watching for that.

Neal 11:44
I have a note in my like collection of notes for this podcast that just says one apple. Just says one apple.

Neal 11:52
Yeah, we were counting apples.

Neal 11:54
And now I can't find my note where I was actually counting everything. We should just start the commentary over on this.

Corey 12:01
I don't think so. I don't think that's true or correct. Looking through notes, this is this is live radio, baby. It's the fucking Solstice baby. The sun is still up.

Neal 12:13
Finally we have Renee Tenison as Sora keeper of the Keyblade Of course.

Neal 12:19
Yeah, naturally.

Neal 12:20
Yeah, Renee Tenison, I said it right this time. Adoni Maropis.

Corey 12:26
Friend of the show, Adoni Maropis.

Neal 12:28
The man who told me I said her name wrong. First time we did this episode. God, that's almost straight from the source. Right?

Neal 12:37
Yeah, we're and we're working hard to do better. Just sort of generally.

Neal 12:41
had Renee Tenison herself reached out that would be the only way it would be more embarrassing.

Corey 12:46
Yeah. Anyway, this fight is good.

Neal 12:48
It's very good. Dana Hee, of course does stunts. In most episodes of conquest. She's an all star. Bam. Kung Lao jump split kick.

Corey 13:00
I believe the way that's edited because it looks like his feet hit at different times.

Neal 13:04
Yeah. He's just got that much control.

Corey 13:08
chaos Control

Neal 13:10
We should probably count Kung Lao jump flip kicks. I'm gonna assume there's 22 of them.

Corey 13:16
16 per half episode. You do the math?

Neal 13:22
Sure. Yeah. Where's that...

Corey 13:24
Anyway, Why do they have these funny little masquerade masks on? This is like worse than a Batman? I guess Batman's is pretty good, because he's like, got a whole suit on. What's a superhero with a bad disguise? One of those? Green lantern Ryan Reynolds version.

Corey 13:44
Kato from Green Hornet and also Green Hornet from Green Hornet.

Corey 13:47
Nobody knows who Kato is.

Neal 13:50
Kato. (typing) woman in alley killed by Siann, I think we're at 20 fatalities. 12 confirmed apples and two broken tables. At least.

Corey 14:04
We got a knife out.

Neal 14:06
And that is our seventh knife. BAM! Hell yeah. Taja kicker in the FACW

Neal 14:12
really just waited a long time. Taja and Siro are all lit like they're completely different sets. Oh, they are for Tasha. It looks like in the middle of the day.

Neal 14:22
I think the background I think they just took a shot of her in a fight post from inside the trading posts like the background had matchup at all.

Taja 14:30
She's dead. Why?

Corey 14:31
Well they snapped her neck earlier

Neal 14:34
Yeah, I'll check her pulse. Oh, her neck is separated from her body. I think we're 20 fatalities.

Neal 14:41
I don't believe that you had no idea it was him. Who else is? I mean, it's Zhu Zin, shits rough and rowdy and wacky and wild, man, but like there's no way you didn't know it was him.

Neal 14:52
Yeah. It was just oh man. Quan Chi is fortress. Look, Speak of the devil. Holy shit. That's Quan Chi his first line that's, uh, that really sets his character doesn't

Quan Chi 15:11
want to see clearly to remind me of what...

Corey 15:14
What a fucking reveal they don't even wait. No, but it's like, here's his whole outfit. Here's his whole book.

Neal 15:20
Here's the best costume in the show. The best makeup in the show. Best Performance in the show. I'm gonna say it. Like,

Corey 15:30
dude, he's sick as hell, man. Yeah,

Neal 15:32
he rules. Shout out to Adoni

Quan Chi 15:35
Still so silent in my presence.

Neal 15:37
I recently watched the Mortal Kombat mythologies Sub-Zero Like

Corey 15:42
already, like already, he's just like, he's more committed than like, anyone. Anybody has been up to this point

Neal 15:49
in the history of all acting ever.

Corey 15:52
Dude, it's so sick. Thank you, Steve Hattman for writing these incredible lines.

Neal 15:56
Hell yeah. He um, you know, Jeff Meek really gunning for him in his Shao Kahn performance, but uh, and of course silk Manning is just natural charisma.

Corey 16:08
That must be Tajaaa. It's like, I'm not even laughing at it. Like I want to make that equivocally clear. This is just sick is

Corey 16:18
great. It's so much fun to watch. Like it's a joy every time his character shows up. Give me the bottle. Give me the ball. He's lost. Broken in the fight.

Corey 16:30
Jaime Pressly talkingike that also funny. Give me the bottle. It is lost like, bro.

Neal 16:38
Yeah, this episode written by Steve Hattman.

Unknown 16:43
Just sending you back. No, please. You will need us Quan Chi. Back to Kung Lao.

Corey 16:53
So, clarification coming from off screen is such a good decision.

Neal 16:58
And he's so pissed about it too. Like you either are talking about Kung Lao, you bothered? What did you think I was sending you? Fuck. This episode was directed by Bruce Seth Green. Who directed some Buffy the Vampire Slayer episodes.

Corey 17:14
Bruce Seth Green.

Neal 17:16
Bruce Seth Green. Yeah, man. I just want to listen every time he talks like I don't even want to talk over it

Neal 17:32
so I think we kept

Corey 17:33
...as night, which has not arrived yet because of the solstice.

Neal 17:41
Who doesn't? like guess vampires probably don't

Corey 17:45
Quan Chi loves the solstice.

Neal 17:47
The Solstice baby.

Neal 17:47
Right but they get they get a solstice later in the year.

Neal 17:49
Oh, they get they get an extra hour sleep because I don't wanna go out yet. Right. It's kind of like daylight savings time for them.

Corey 17:55
I mean, they also get a really good a yawn. Oh, no. Anyway, that jokes over I think.

Neal 18:02
Yeah, that's fine.

Corey 18:04
Yeahyeahyahyeah

Neal 18:05
Dust of the Netherrealm. I somehow just kept calling it Netherrealm sand. Kung Lao was off to the temple

Corey 18:24
How can I forget everybody making fun of things that Kung Lao holds completely dear.

Neal 18:29
She hates church dude. She's won our church shirt though. But she hates church

Neal 18:39
set out some Kung Lao. He gets Spruced up for you all the time. Don't be jealous This is why they wore the masks so they could come back with another plan and not be recognized.

Corey 18:56
Anyway, can I say that I know that like this kind of shaving is real. Yeah, it is but this makes me so uncomfortable just to watch.

Corey 19:06
Yeah, man. She just like sliced the fuck I don't know if you've ever you've cut yourself shaving Right? Like

Corey 19:12
All the time. you think ai was mostly trying to cut my face

Neal 19:24
Siann doesn't even use a fake name just uses her own name.

Neal 19:27
Well, that's my subtitles had an extra end on it. So maybe that's what they were yet.

Neal 19:31
That's just the spelling of the name.

Corey 19:34
No that was two Ns.

Neal 19:35
Yeah, it's spelled with two Ns and the current

Neal 19:36
Well earlier had a one N

Neal 19:38
Well, someone fucked up earlier.

Corey 19:41
Well take it up with like the Department of Education or whatever it

Neal 19:44
is. I'm gonna put it in the IMDB trivia. I guess the they are based in Tampa. I could go over there.

Corey 19:51
We could go there. Yeah. IN HELLL

Corey 19:54
(sad trombones)

Neal 20:04
Alright, this is Kung Lao getting baited number two.

Neal 20:08
It's been like five minutes.

Neal 20:10
It's the next morning for him. It wasn't even a full 24 hours for he's gonna fall for it again.

Corey 20:16
Where are you? He's just trying to like follow the sound of the her voice like he's not even like, I'll go out of my way to get put in a compromising situation.

Neal 20:25
How did she know?

Corey 20:26
Hey it's me, a random woman leaning up against the tree in a way that makes me look like I'm stuck.

Neal 20:32
Well, she is she's tied with leather.

Corey 20:36
I didn't notice.

Neal 20:38
Yeah, around her neck. Boom.

Corey 20:43
I was strangling is not I think how you would describe that?

Corey 20:47
Oh, maybe in Zhu Zin highway man,

Corey 20:54
it was Barry Lyndon

Neal 20:55
Can I tell you something fucked up?

Corey 20:58
Um, sure we're here.

Neal 21:00
So you know how David Carradine died, right?

Corey 21:04
Yes, I am familiar with that.

Neal 21:06
Okay. Well, I was

Corey 21:08
cannot wait to see where this is going.

Neal 21:11
Earlier today. Before we started the recording I was I was checking out a movie I just discovered exists called Evil Toons. Like T-o-o-n-s

Corey 21:35
right...

Neal 21:37
That's all

Corey 21:39
okay.

Neal 21:40
just felt weird to see that in a movie because I was like, Oh, no. Thats all

Neal 21:49
"Fool" I forgot that she has like a vaguely Shakespearean way of speaking

Neal 21:55
she's just phenomenal. There I said it. Look

Corey 22:00
we know how you feel about Jamie Pressly.

Corey 22:04
she doesn't know yet

Corey 22:04
Commercial Paul

Neal 22:08
Don't even dare slide into her DMs it'd be so much easier if she had a cameo. Oh, yeah commercial.

Corey 22:15
I said it alright commercials ever pull.

Neal 22:17
It is actually over on the at the same time this time. They fucking nail but plan dude.

Corey 22:24
He's just got a regular chair.

Neal 22:26
Really It's like yeah, it's like a chair.

Corey 22:31
Yeah, you know, chairs.

Neal 22:33
It's like the chair I used to sit in to do this podcast before I bought

Neal 22:37
they they have already had board outfits that are made characters. They're changing outfits

Neal 22:40
They're changing outfits like Jen. Really. This is outfit three for all of them. That's nine total.

Quan Chi 22:49
should thank me without goodness. Like, Life can be so much more

Corey 22:59
Just the joy Quan Chi brings me dude. Fucking awesome

Neal 23:06
its so much fun

Corey 23:09
He looks like he's havinf the most fun anyone has ever had.

Neal 23:12
God. God the character is yeah, just the worst.

Quan Chi 23:19
It's alright. You know, I can fix you. And that pleases me so much to know how...

Neal 23:24
I feel like like we should remind the audience's that this this exact same plan to infect our heroes and bring out all the evil in them. Quan Chi uses again in defend

Corey 23:36
Defenders of the Realm.

Neal 23:37
Yeah, but in that one, he uses a big stone instead of NetherRealm. Sand, right?

Mika 23:48
God stop.

Neal 23:52
Also, he's a he's a snake guy in that movie. He's got like, a pet TV show. And that TV show

Quan Chi 24:04
...STENCH OF DEATH

Corey 24:10
Dude's having the time of his fucking life dude.

Neal 24:13
Just fucking hanging out in Central Florida

Corey 24:15
This show really spikes here. Yeah, and it's already pretty good.

Neal 24:21
I know. But this like, really? This is what sells you on the show. You make it to this episode.

Neal 24:26
You're like, Okay, this is you have eight hours to kill.

Neal 24:29
You could honestly Fuck it. Like I am not one to watch stuff out of order. But uh, this is I watched this episode last week just for fun. Knowing we were gonna do it again for the podcast. I was like, I don't care. I'm watching it now.

Neal 24:51
Nice that they like, shot from the other side so they'd have to spend the money on the special effects of her face rotting.

Neal 25:09
don't like all of the decisions the character makes

Kid 25:12
Kung Lao! your back, can we spar toda like you promised?

Kung Lao 25:24
No.

Corey 25:25
like I just I forgot mad he like he's never like Paolo Montalban has never looked angrier

Neal 25:34
He's never been mad in real life. He's never been this angry

Corey 25:40
You know howfun this must be for the actors

Neal 25:46
Sure, especially after how many weeks stuck in Central Florida.

Corey 25:50
Siro it's like 80% in the bag already.

Neal 25:54
Right? He's been chugging jars of wine all day. It

Corey 25:57
was like it's messy in here. I'm mad about it

Neal 26:05
BAM kick his ass Tada.

Corey 26:06
Kick his ass.

Neal 26:10
Oh she has been stealing

Corey 26:11
punch his ass.

Corey 26:20
just, Rayden. is just gonna be like Hey, everybody. Fine. Okay.

Neal 26:28
Yeah

Corey 26:29
women do be shoppin'

Neal 26:32
do be shoppin boy you got it. Oh, wait.

Corey 26:45
Hey, sweetheart. As he's like, blowing it by being like, gross to this, this like lady who did not ask for it.

Neal 26:56
Poor Magda. This is this is (sad trombone)

Corey 27:05
Ew! Jesus Christ.

Neal 27:09
He's like, I've been listening. No, I'm not gonna

Corey 27:15
He's drinking out of like, like an Ikea like flower vase. Yeah, Daniel Bernhardt is like I'm a bad guy. Or face. They're just like, sweaty, drunk, delirious, just like hair in his face. Man.

Neal 27:30
Do you think he was actually like drinking on set? Maybe he actually had some wine in there. God

Corey 27:34
God if I was him, I probably you know, maybe slightly.

Neal 27:40
It's Florida, man. Anything goes

Corey 27:42
Yeah, you don't want to do it Too much. Sure. Because like you're you're at work. Right? You know, but like,

Neal 27:50
you think everyone on the show wasn't? I mean?

Corey 27:55
Wasn't at work? I think everybody was

Neal 27:57
like, just drinking.

Corey 28:01
No, I think we got consummate professionals here.

Neal 28:04
Sure, but I mean, are they so professional that it doesn't affect their work?

Corey 28:08
And now it's like Siro Siro Siro Siro, Siro, so

Neal 28:11
Siro don't don't do it. Leave Magda alone she doesn't have a name in the show yet.

Magda 28:26
your an animal, a pathetic animal. And I hope I never laid eyes on you again.

Neal 28:36
suddenly got less fun.

Corey 28:39
Just briefly get less fun by a pretty significant amount. Also, can I just say how insane This is? That they're like, Hey, what happened to Cassie? And then she just goes she's dead? Like doesn't even wait like a second to be like,

Neal 28:53
no, she just she's like she's dead.

Corey 28:55
Somebody murdered her.

Neal 28:57
This this woman meanwhile is like not involved in this at all. She's just stealing the off the flowers

Neal 29:09
my throats a little little horse.

Corey 29:12
Mine is to actually. it's gotta because it's a long day with the summer solstice. Am I righr?

Neal 29:19
Absolutely Jesus

Neal 29:19
she's about to steal from a dead person.

Corey 29:22
She's dead Nobody knows if you're stealing from a dead guy

Neal 29:26
right this is like technically a grave robbing um, she just gonna be buried here to fertilize the flowers she's selling

Corey 29:35
Grave robbing, that thing that's famously really cool.

Neal 29:39
Drunk ass Siro drinking his Crown Royal

Corey 29:44
Kung Lao walking in like he's actively trying to murder somebody like he's like a hunched over this like, absolute rage. At least Siro is like

Corey 29:58
Why What is he drinking out of like? Why is he using like, just this random?

Neal 30:05
I don't know. It's the same. It's the same kind of bottle that Kiri and Ankha drink out of.

Corey 30:10
Yeah, I forgot that he went to Jen's room.

Neal 30:13
Yeah dude just fucked up. Like went through like her underwear drawer or some shit oh fuck

Corey 30:28
I will say I do commend his ability to challenge the guy who won Mortal Kombat to a fight

Neal 30:33
Yeah he's that drunk. Right he's thought he has thought this entire show that he could kick Kung Lao was asked that's why he was so mad the news site bought Episode

Kung Lao 30:42
You're a used up freeloading bodyguard who couldn't even do that right when you had the job. You let Jen die

Neal 30:51
boys fight Oh, also a cool fight. I like this one. The close quarters fights are pretty good in this like, I think we've had several engines room at this point.

Corey 31:03
Yeah, I mean, it's because you know you can land comfortably on a soft bed.

Neal 31:07
Yeah, and use it like as part of the fight

Corey 31:11
all right. I was like that's a great fall over that chair.

Neal 31:14
That was good. Okay, are we counting the chairs and broken yet? Are we gonna count broken chairs?

Corey 31:20
No, I think we're okay. Okay, the chair might live actually

Neal 31:24
yeah, I guess it did survived

Corey 31:26
we will call it a fatality if the chair breaks

Neal 31:28
yes we will

Corey 31:29
man This fight is so good.

Corey 31:32
This is one of the Is this like a one of the best fights we've had these guys fucking throwing each other around in a way that the other fights just don't really have. Yeah, man. Like it's very visceral. was like hey again this feels like friends fighting

Neal 31:48
the tight quarters. No pun intended. Like allow them to do a lot of slamming each other in the walls and stuff

Corey 31:55
no pun intended?

Neal 31:57
Bam. Yeah. I'm not going to explain it to you

Corey 32:01
okay, because I don't get it

Neal 32:04
that's fine somebody out there will get it and they can tweet @mrcoreyprice and tell you

Neal 32:18
he like he just fucking kicked the drunk out of Siro dude. This bam.

Corey 32:21
What a great looking shot. That was great. This this so far has truly made this show at its peak.

Neal 32:34
Yes, absolutely.

Corey 32:37
The apotheosis of Mortal Kombat conquest speaking of apotheosis a God is about to show

Corey 32:39
Oh show commercial Paul.

Neal 32:38
Yeah, it is.

Corey 32:39
I've always preferred anticapitalist Paul

Corey 32:43
commercials over Paul

Neal 32:44
is over.

Corey 32:49
Rayden showing up is so funny. Bam. In Paolo Montalban cuz let's face is just like he's like Sith Lord levels.

Neal 32:59
There's my favorite line deliveries. Come in, hold on, hold on.

Kung Lao 33:02
Just let him lie there.

Neal 33:03
Right there. I fucking love that. I don't know the way he like waves his hand just so dismissively

Corey 33:10
here he's just so fucking mad. Yeah. Baiting me

Corey 33:28
God remember we watched the Raven?

Neal 33:30
Yeah, dude, Raven was so good. I've been trying to keep an eye out to see if Jeff Meek in this show ever says "See how easy life can be?" Not once yet, but if you hear it,

Corey 33:43
dude Kung Lao is the dude who got most fucking, like, he went on rage pilled like really?

Neal 33:48
listened to it. Yeah, he found that like a bad YouTube rabbit hole. Right

Corey 33:58
The only kind of YouTube rabbit hole at this point.

Neal 34:02
Yeah, yeah, don't forget to sign up.

Corey 34:06
Still raise Siro we're gonna make you look cool as hell. Subscribe to our YouTube

Neal 34:09
for our channel. It's all good stuff

Neal 34:15
slap him slap him awake for me. Angry

Corey 34:21
angry

Corey 34:22
angeyi

Rayden 34:26
Siro where's Taja?

Neal 34:27
She's out there shopping dude

Corey 34:30
Could you imagine if he just whispered women be shopping?

Neal 34:34
shouldn't be a surprise because they never know what Taja is up to.

Corey 34:39
They don't That's true.

Neal 34:41
Ever .

Neal 34:41
you shouldn't move Oh shit. There's some blood.

Corey 34:47
Oh, they love ketchup on the bag.

Neal 34:51
Was he just stirring that with his pinky?

Corey 34:59
Yeah, probably. Soraaaa

Neal 35:01
fucking rules this is a good set to the whole Quan Chi sets very cool haunted house spooky right?

Corey 35:11
Yeah

Neal 35:14
he's drinking Coca Cola Starlight

Quan Chi 35:18
the best is yet to come

Neal 35:25
this escalated real fucking quick

Corey 35:27
Where's Taja? I don't know she's about to get hanged

Neal 35:31
She's about to get David Carradine'd

Corey 35:35
rim shot maybe? Sure

Corey 35:40
he won't there's no way that was.

Neal 35:47
That was yeah,

Corey 35:50
I assumed you just hit the wrong button.

Corey 35:55
oh I didn't hear at that time.

Neal 35:56
It's cool when we get to see Rayden do LIGHTNING POWERS

Neal 36:04
you think this is part of that rotoscope lightning Film Festival in Australia?

Corey 36:10
God willing

Corey 36:13
Rayden in fucking Jedi mode.

Neal 36:15
Yeah, dude. He never wears the hat. He hasn't worn the hat since the first episode.

Corey 36:22
It was for the tournament.

Neal 36:23
I guess it's because he had to put the hood up. Right I do kind of wish we had gotten to see more of Taja as like how she got caught and shit. Because we did just sort of like jump way ahead like last time we saw her she took a ring off a dead body and now the whole town's trying to murder her.

Corey 36:45
Right

Corey 36:52
this might be the first time we saw the nighttime CGI establishing shot.

Corey 36:58
Sorry, I'm very old. I'm very disguised.

Neal 37:05
I love that she knows him.

Corey 37:10
I'm Raven.

Neal 37:12
Jonathan Raven.

Rayden 37:18
You're a long way from your home. Sora What's he doing here?

Neal 37:22
So she had to look into his eyes to recognize him. Do you think his face used to look different?

Corey 37:29
Yeah, his body is entirely contained within his eyes. Oh, so they just put it into different bodies.

Neal 37:35
Okay. That's why the actors change between this and the movies.

Corey 37:41
Yeah, it's all in the eyes. Speaking of the eyes as well, the lightnings in there.

Neal 37:50
That was pretty sick looking like purpley.

Corey 37:51
gonna act like I knew that was coming in. That's why I started making the joke.

Neal 37:51
Yeah, totally.

Corey 37:52
It is cool to see that even Rayden despite not being infected with rage blood is really sort of peeking.

Neal 37:59
Yeah, this is good. Jeff Meek. Everyone is on fucking fire in this episode.

Corey 38:06
Yeah, they're really swinging for the fences. And I can say that because this is the fastest one of these episodes has gone by. Not that the others were slugs, but like you just truck through this one. It's been half an hour. Like geez

Neal 38:18
it's like yeah, we're near the end. I want it to go on another.

Corey 38:23
Can't wait for the new movie Thor thunder rumble.

Neal 38:31
We have not called Rayden the storm warrior nearly enough in our commentaries.

Corey 38:35
By the way, the titular stormwarrior ravine

Neal 38:39
Or The Thunderer

Corey 38:43
Thundercat. I'm in jail.

Neal 38:50
I'm in the tiny jail. In the trading post. They have a real jail in the basement. Why isn't she in that one? Like she was in that jail in the first episode.

Taja 39:04
What's happening to me?

Rayden 39:06
It's happened to all of you. The work of a man named Quan Chi.

Neal 39:09
He said the thing No shit.

Neal 39:14
was just the one button press

Corey 39:20
for tune

Corey 39:24
what?

Neal 39:24
I dont know. Just every now and then you say a word wrong and it's funny.

Corey 39:29
That's all comedy.

Neal 39:30
It's the height. It's the peak of comedy

Corey 39:33
Rayden doesn't have healing powers

Neal 39:35
Oh, yes. Sick first aid skills

Corey 39:38
that did sound sick. Wow. That's like a 240 P. Shot. Movie.

Neal 39:45
Pretty sure that is the picture on the Wikipedia page.

Corey 39:47
That was a postcard.

Corey 39:50
Kung Lao went to where all of his friends hang out and just beat the shit

Neal 39:53
the absolute shit out of all of the every single monk. All of them This episode needed like an extended cut

Corey 40:02
I forgot tht he almost executed a monk.

Neal 40:06
Yeah, he's about to cut a dude's head off right

Corey 40:11
there like oh, it really got to Kung Lao Holy

Corey 40:13
Commerical, Paul,

Neal 40:14
yeah, man. This isn't like I want the extended version of this episode where we see

Corey 40:19
anti capitalism, Paul

Neal 40:21
All of it

Neal 40:23
BAM more lightning

Corey 40:26
fucking sick Rayden finally gets the show off a little bit. Right God, he is going full fucking Sith mode.

Neal 40:33
Like he is.

Corey 40:36
Like, there's like, I think that this is instructive in that. This is really highlighting the degree to which there is an obscene amount of hidden below the surface rage within Kung Lao. That he is remarkably good at hemming in because he has a lot of angst about this whole Mortal Kombat thing.

Neal 40:55
That's why he goes to the temple all the time and meditates and you know, hangs out with his monk buddies

Corey 41:05
and vibes

Neal 41:09
except this time he beat the shit out of all of them

Neal 41:06
we're not gonna see like more Rayden like showing off his powers until I think the last episode

Corey 41:19
"You almost killed a monk!" half this commentary just repeating lines back to the show because it's been so good.

Neal 41:26
God, Jeff Meek as Rayden I don't know why I said his name, finally figured out finally figured out the Quan Chi plan

Neal 41:38
he's after your soul, Kung Lao just like everybody else on the show is

Corey 41:45
why did he call him bald for no reason?

Neal 41:49
Yeah, don't pick on, come on. The guy can't help it. Right?

Corey 41:53
Yeah, man, you you do want to steal

Rayden 41:55
you want to steal as much as Siro wants to drink and Kung Lao to kill

Neal 41:59
Damn. Called Out

Rayden 42:00
Can't or won't see something doesn't mean it's not there. When you were a conscious thief, what do you do?

Neal 42:12
God he's gonna be like, Yeah, but you'd liked it too. Right?

Corey 42:19
Yeah, I don't know if I love this. Yeah. Because it's like, it doesn't have to be that. She did. She did have a pretty good reason.

Neal 42:31
Sure, but let's also just I mean, I think it's more that she's like an adrenaline junkie because she also signed up to to fight Shang Tsung right.

Corey 42:45
Got Jeff Meek is fucking poppin off dude.

Rayden 42:47
A guy who just wants to sing dirty songs, Belch and pinch women

Neal 42:55
the writing is so good. Do you want to do another commentary about this episode next week?

Corey 43:01
I'd consider it

Neal 43:06
what we should do is watch this in the discord with everybody

Corey 43:15
I want to let this emotional moment happen before I answer your question there wasn't a question but you know

Corey 43:26
don't talk in the second person, he's Kung Lao

Corey 43:35
Jeff Meek good at this whole acting thing

Neal 43:40
He is, he, God I wanna watch raven like right now

Corey 43:46
Fucking same. And also I want to watch Mortal Kombat conquest

Neal 43:52
two screens at the same time see if they sync up in an interesting way.

Corey 43:57
See if it kills me

Neal 44:02
I like that they give us some characterization for

Corey 44:04
I liked that they think they can keep a secret from Quan Chi.

Neal 44:07
Quan Chi's slaves right

Corey 44:12
this is like outfit number five.

Neal 44:15
Well, we're back to outfit number one really, But yeah, it's another costume change the body suits I didn't understand like

Corey 44:26
she does like to kill

Neal 44:29
Oh yeah. Siann does love murder

Neal 44:40
they're all really good. I'm just gonna say Jamie Presley go on MK Podques

Corey 44:48
is their hair getting bigger with every cut? Everybody's hair was just getting bigger. Quan Chi just been in the room the whole time. I've got a secret fucking like pirate Ira even though he doesn't, pirate,

Neal 45:05
yes, it's 100% He's got swashbuckler energy

Corey 45:14
to slideshow. Conveniently, they're all still here while Quan Chi just like I'm gonna go talk to Kung Lao,

Neal 45:23
I'm gonna go kill him and take his soul.

Corey 45:27
Your soul Yeah, look at this smile. That's so good.

Neal 45:36
I'm laughing at Quan Chi's delivery so like dismissive.

Corey 45:40
Yeah, cuz he's better than everybody.

Neal 45:42
Yeah. Look at you. You've all grown you're grown up and ready to fight Kung Lao? I don't know. I'm tired.

Corey 45:50
Good Rayden

Neal 45:57
bam, Phantom Zone time. Oh, snap.

Corey 46:05
Damn. You've stopped looking like you're gonna punch anybody.

Neal 46:13
They're like alright, so you just kind of like yeah, let's go to Applebee's guys.

Corey 46:20
Quan Chi you can't act like you don't know why Rayden cares about this

Neal 46:28
I liked that. He's like, I'm gonna I'm gonna get Kung Lao soul not to keep or to get stronger but test sell. This is commercial Quan Chi

Corey 46:50
this is good fucking television. With all

Neal 46:53
those spikes and shit.

Corey 46:59
It's the shine

Neal 47:01
Green magic Hell yeah. That'll be the thumbnail

Corey 47:04
Fine I'll put my skulls away

Neal 47:03
and my collar and my gauntlets.

Neal 47:11
Battle I want to like make punching sounds along with this. You talked about the Sith earlier now Quan Chi is the high ground Hey, yo, and

Corey 47:25
he's got big fucking shoulder pads

Neal 47:30
all the flips he's doing in the doorway.

Corey 47:33
Mortal Kombat conquest brought to you by the Obi Wan show

Neal 47:38
the Disney plus.com and enter the promo code Qwanchy

Corey 47:43
Go to Acre gold .edu and enter the code Warby Parker to get a mattress I don't know

Neal 47:51
sponsored by liquid death this is cool like the all the splits and stuff he's doing?

Corey 47:56
Yeah, there is some real flexible guys yeah

Neal 48:01
some some bendy boys. Right.

Corey 48:05
I've heard of it. Yeah, the fact that he just like locks himself in between the pillars for no reason

Neal 48:10
was again he's obsessed with gaining the high ground

Corey 48:14
it's just it's just cool.

Neal 48:16
Yeah there's a couple of shots I think where they just zoom in on his face and he's screaming that wasn't one of them

Neal 48:44
so many flips

Neal 49:00
don't how did how did Quan Chi figured out just by not

Corey 49:04
why does he not mentioned that Taja also lived because the casual sexism

Neal 49:10
Yeah, the show doesn't really care about

Corey 49:13
I'm gonna go into the floor

Corey 49:21
Kung Lao is still so mad.

Neal 49:22
Yeah

Corey 49:27
like not dying.

Neal 49:28
Let's go home and watch some TV.

Corey 49:31
Anti capitalism Paul.

Neal 49:36
That's actually capitalism, Paul. This is an extended one. They're just showing the whole fight over again. It's still going on. Yep, that is a it's really still going on.

Corey 49:48
veganism, Paul.

Neal 49:49
It's over Paul. Fucking long. They could have given us like, eight more second

Corey 49:57
They're just leaving Siro behind.

Neal 49:59
They Yeah This is fucked up Siro

Corey 50:01
is dying

Neal 50:02
Siro is mostly dead he is there though

Corey 50:12
the monks

Neal 50:15
yeah they're real great at crumbling burn take that master Hwang I think

Neal 50:32
now we get like the moral lesson wrap up

Corey 50:34
but Boy Meets World moment where they walked through the golden hour woods. It's where Winnie the Pooh lives the golden hour woods and go take a photo in the golden hour woods. It's the summer solstice man, the sun's still out,

Neal 50:49
dude. It's yeah, it is the summer solstice in this episode to man it must be

Corey 50:56
Sundowns when you make of it in your mind,

Neal 50:59
yes, Sun sun's out guns out

Corey 51:11
Sun Lau to give up

Corey 51:15
just do what you were doing before you got poisoned with rage. It is infectious. Just do what you were doing.

Neal 51:24
As you pointed out, Siro is like almost dead and Rayden is forcing them to walk back instead of use his magic to just take them back like how he took them their

Corey 51:38
Captionss by Vitac. Burbank, Pittsburgh, Tampa and Washington DC.

Neal 51:41
Yeah, I'll head up to the to the Tampa office

Neal 51:44
and the US Department of Education.

Neal 51:48
That Siann spelling error. Fucking fucking good episode God

Corey 51:52
best one to date.

Neal 51:53
But might be the best one just THE BEST ONE

Corey 51:56
It's entirely possible.

Neal 51:58
I mean, I like those Kreeya episodes too

Corey 51:59
What's tough is we have like, we have like 12 more so by the time that we get there. It's gonna feel like it was so long.

Neal 52:06
I can't even know. We can just watch this one again.

Corey 52:09
Every other week

Neal 52:10
Oh, you never answered me. You want to do this on our on our Discord sometime?

Corey 52:16
Yeah, um, yeah, we'll figure it out. We'll find some kind of free time for that.

Neal 52:21
Yeah, by the way, if you donate to our Ko-Fi, you're gonna get a discord invite everybody.

Corey 52:28
Yeah, we do have a discord. We do.

Neal 52:31
It's it's a private group right now. But yeah, we have a we have a Ko-fi page KO-FI.COM/MKPODQUEST. I am not givInG the other address because I think the forwarding is messed up.

Corey 52:47
Okay.

Neal 53:02
And yeah, if you sign up there, we have a tier. It's $3 a month, you get access to our private Discord server. And I want to hook you up with a few extras I probably can't talk about here in case certain big media conglomerates are listening.

Corey 53:05
You know who you are

Neal 53:06
Yeah, yeah, they definitely know who they are. I've already gotten copyright strikes on our YouTube channel.

Corey 53:12
Yet. We didn't think it was ever gonna happen on account of let's be honest. They're not paying attention for this stuff. But it took like, a long time, but it did happen

Neal 53:24
to happen a few times. But we handle it. No worries. Yeah, we know a guy. Anyway.

Corey 53:31
We know a guy his name is Side Meier Wire Winder. And he fixes all of our copyright claims.

Neal 53:38
There's a joke for just you and me

Neal 53:45
that wasn't even in the that doesn't even sell that was somewhere else.

Corey 53:51
Yeah, well, if you know, you know.

Neal 53:53
Anyway, what are we doing next time. Next time we're going to read something I am predicting is going to be insane. Featuring

Neal 54:02
Is it RaynoKano?

Neal 54:02
It's RaynoKayno. Yes, exactly. Featuring I think, I don't think Corey You have ever felt good about anything Kano related that we've covered on the show.

Corey 54:15
No I've, just I don't have the disposition for it.

Neal 54:30
For for a Kano

Corey 54:43
Yeah, I think well, like you know, varying degrees like 95 movie Kano. I can I can deal with, comic book Kano Sure. New Movie Kano,, I would seriously like rather puke out my own organs. That's just how I feel about that.

Neal 54:43
For $3 a month. You can tell Corey, he's wrong about that in our Discord server.

Corey 54:48
And if you pay me $1 million. I will crimes of the future style puke out an organ. this episode brought to you by Crimes of the Future

Corey 55:02
Enter discount code "crimes" to get-

Neal 55:11
Get what? It's costing them a million dollars.

Corey 55:14
You get 20% off the third heart you grow

Neal 55:19
20 It's a million dollars after the discount. Ordinarily, but you're cutting them a deal. Yeah, so yeah, we're gonna spend some time with your favorite characters Rayden and Kano issues one through three coming up next on the show. After that, we get another Quan Chi episode of Mortal Kombat conquest, but also it has Shang Tsung and Vorpax in it and the return of Jen so yay

Corey 55:50
Yeah, the sun's starting to go down and I frankly can't stomach seeing the solstice and I may seriously die.

Neal 55:57
Do you feel like we've gone the distance?

Corey 56:00
Do you feel like we're going for speed?

Neal 56:02
Yeah, let's go for speed quick plugs fast go superbill go

Corey 56:06
they made another one. It says it was reboots movies, remix podcast, friends mutually. @Theymadeanother Twitter they made another one on your podcast services other one fast cars real. Formula One podcast is called strat2 strat like the word strategy to like the number after one.

Neal 56:23
Yes, damn. That was those are some fast credits man.

Corey 56:33
I lived I lived to speed

Neal 56:33
and you can find me on Twitter @finalNeal.

Corey 56:40
He's the last one

Neal 56:40
on Instagram @finalnealretro

Corey 56:40
When Neal dies God forbid there won't be anymore I don't think you understand the severity of the situation.

Neal 56:46
I am the end I am the I Am the final Neal.

Corey 56:49
That's why he started a new podcast. Yeah, document more of the last Neal

Neal 56:53
Crew Expendable a podcast all about the alien media franchise movies, books, comics. Eventually a TV show some predator stuff sprinkled in there when necessary. Crewexpendable.net I do that with our friend Kenny. Shout out to Kenny

Corey 57:10
vs Spenny. Bet he's ever heard that one before.

Neal 57:14
Crew expendable in your podcast app @crewexpendapod on Twitter goddamnit. If you own crew expendable on Twitter, I'll give you $7 for it

Neal 57:42
that's it?

Neal 57:41
That's the you that's the starting point. For negotiations, follow this show on Twitter @MKpodquest and Instagram @MKpodquest. We got those because who else is going to take those? Just us. Subscribe in your podcast app MKpodquest.com. Find links to all the player services find links to our merch shop find links to where you can support the show. Ko-fi.com/mkpodquest rate us good. B give us good ones. Yeah.

Corey 57:59
Oh wait, I have one more. I have one more.

Neal 58:06
Okay. All right.

Corey 58:08
Vote for Pedro. Get it?

Neal 58:12
Yeah.

Corey 58:12
It's like the funny it's like the it's like the it's like the funny... (*cacaphony of sound effects*)

This transcript was generated by https://otter.ai

Creators and Guests

corey price
Host
corey price
Co-host of MK Podquest, They Made Another One?! and Strat2
Neal Hallstrom
Host
Neal Hallstrom
Co-host and editor of MK Podquest and Crew Expendable, Sega enthusiast, proud Zune owner
Commentary: Mortal Kombat Conquest Episode 9 - QUAN CHI
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